These unconventional relationships can be incredibly fulfilling—but they also have rules, just like monogamous relationships do. From agreeing on who to date, to practicing safe sex, polyamorous people set all kinds of rules to ensure their relationships are loving, healthy, and supportive.

Trying to force a person in a box—for example, trying to say, “You can only date both of us and you have to develop a relationship with both of us that's exactly the same and grows in exactly the same way”—rarely works. Instead, treat your relationships in a way that respects what they are.

Speak before spoken to means not keeping secrets or information to yourself. Whether it is looking at a dating website, texting (or sexting) someone, calling them, meeting them, having interest in them, planning a date with them, etc… You and your partner don't yet know what the real expectations are.

How long do poly relationships last? On average, about 5-8 years. Polyamorous relationships tend to last quite a while. Since polyamorous people tend to be communicative, open, honest, and emotionally available, they tend to be very good at managing conflict and making decisions as a collective.